Cycle 3 Session 15 - Trust & Forgiveness

Self-Reflection Questions

WHO can you be vulnerable with?   

WHAT is something you would like to put your trust in but struggle with? 

WHERE is an appropriate place to be open and fully honest when sharing your thoughts? 

WHY do beliefs about forgiveness and trust differ from person to person or situation to situation?

WHEN there is true forgiveness, does there always have to be trust?

HOW much of forgiveness is based on action and how much on emotion?

What is Trust? - To rely on another person because you feel safe with them and have confidence that they will not hurt or violate you in any way. To have a belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or willpower of a person not to wrong you in any way. Slightly unrealistic for a human to have 100% trust in another person, knowing that as humans our brains are pre-programmed for survival: freeze, fight, fight, rescue according to our V.E.S.P.M. beliefs. 

Trust & Truma - Truma can also affect the way we trust and forgive. Be mindful of each situation. 

What is Forgiveness?  - Your forgiveness does not automatically change the other person's current V.E.S.P.M. beliefs. Therefore, forgiveness does not always come with trust. Forgiveness is a VALUE that sometimes comes with the ETHICS that can bring it into a SPIRITUAL alignment. This will cause you to express your forgiveness in a PHYSICAL way that is healthy for both persons MENTALLY.

How can you begin to build trust?

1. Recognize you need to trust others.

We are social beings and cannot have close relationships without some trust. 

2. Acknowledge areas in which you already trust others.

You trust strangers every day; handling your money at the bank, taking care of your health, delivering your mail, etc.

3. Be realistic when it comes to trusting someone 

No one is 100% trustworthy, not even you. Time and unforeseen events will happen to everyone 

4. Only share your trusted things (secrets, etc.) with a person who has shown you that they are trustworthy.

Start with small confidences and see what happens. Use discernment when it comes to trust 

5. Trust yourself first.

Listen to that little voice in your head or that feeling inside of yourself and trust it. Learn to trust yourself first/

Self-Reflection Points

• Withholding some information about yourself at times shows that you have boundaries and self-discipline.

• Laziness is no excuse to put your private responsibilities in someone else's hands. That is not about trusting the wrong person; that's about you not handling your responsibilities. Your responsibilities are only a priority to you.

• Use common sense. Everyone is not to be trusted. There is a reason that we can forgive and not forget. 

• If someone is known for not being trustworthy, don't become their next victim. 

• Not trusting certain people can make your life complicated. A professional or a doctor may need to know your personal information so that they can help you. 

• In any relationship, there must be trust and forgiveness in order to have a harmonious flow.  Start small and work on it.

• "Social" "media" may not be a good way to "share" your private information.  Before sharing, ask yourself, "Why am I sharing this information?" If the answer is negative or not uplifting, this may turn on you. 

"A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in pictures of silver" Proverbs 25:11 Holy Bible