Cycle 4 Session 19 - Identifying Loving & Caring Relationships

Self-Reflection Questions

WHO is currently in your life that makes you feel loved unconditionally?

WHAT "love languages" are mostly exchanged during time spent with a person with unconditional love?

WHERE are your boundaries when dealing with loved ones, and are they usually fine with them? 

WHY do you feel you deserve to have loving relationships in your life?

WHEN trauma is mixed in with the word "love," how do you begin to separate the two? 

HOW can you fall in love after being hurt so many times?

Love languages 

Words of kindness - Genuine words that a person feels about you, that, when expressed to you, make you feel good or motivated.  

Physical touch - A loving, appropriate touch that makes you feel good. It can be a closeness, a cuddle, or a hug, depending on the person. 

Acts of service - This can look like any random act of kindness. It can also be a helpful act of service to lighten someone's load. A "just because" act of service. 

Quality time - Time spent with another person, uninterrupted by insignificant things. Time that is used to get to know another person on a deeper level. Listening and converting with another person.

Heartfelt gift giving - A gift given that suggests they know personal things about the other person. A gift that says "I was thinking about you." 

Signs of a Loving & Caring Relationship 

Respect- Respect for each other's Values, Ethics, Spirituality, Physical, and Mental beliefs. 

Adapt – A willingness to learn and support each other's goals. 

Communication -  Learn how each other likes to be listened to and spoken to. 

Connecting – Continue to reintroduce yourselves. As you learn new things and have new experiences, share them, take pictures, and write them down.

Humility – Be willing to PAUSE!  Allowing time for personal self-reflection. Not pushing or imposing your ideas, beliefs, or boundaries on someone. and vs vs 

Unconditional Self-love – This love is based on how you feel about your V.E.S.P.M. (Values, Ethics, Spirituality, Physical, and Mental) beliefs. Only you know what's more likely to change. However, you love yourself just the way you are. As you grow, you will become a better you and not a better someone else.

Self-Reflection Points

• Unconditional love comes without judgment or shame. It is a Godly kind of love. 

•  A loving person will always contribute to your values, ethics, spirituality, physical, and mental health. 

• When using love languages, you must use discernment. "KNOW BEFORE YOU GO," everyone's idea of a heartfelt gift, or a kind touch, can be different, etc.

• RED FLAGS! Your emotions can help guide you with this. When you're being loved, it is a sure feeling of happiness and security. If you don't feel that way, you may need to reconsider the situation.

• Abuse and trauma can change how we feel about connecting to people. Love will usually feel uncomfortable and unwanted at first. Give yourself time and use baby steps. Don't give up on yourself.

• Remember "Life is Good and no Bad is in it. comes with it, only Lessons and Blessings!"

"Hope deferred maketh the heart sick: but when the desire cometh, it is a tree of life" Proverbs 13:12