C7 Session 53 - Knowing The Facts Before I React

Key Questions

WHO job is it to fix everyone/s problems?

WHAT will the situation look like if resolved?

WHERE is the mindset and emotions of the parties involved? 

WHY is it important that you find out the consequences before reacting to anything? 

WHEN do you think is the appropriate time to back off from a situation?

HOW many resources/others is it going to take to help the situation? 

Rule # 1 is to S.T.O.P.

Stop – Do you know enough hard facts about the situation to make an impact?

Think – How will this affect my V.E.S.P.M. plan and boundaries?

Observe – Is this the right time to react or should I just listen?

Predict – What will be the outcome if I react in this way or that way?

Self-Reflection Points

• Don't assume. Listen and ask questions until you are clear about what is going on and what everyone's goals are.

• Remember every day people change and you are not a mind reader. Don't think for someone else. Clear communication is important.

• Don't assume what's important to you is important to someone else. We all have different V.E.S.P.M. beliefs.

• Take into consideration your current state of mind emotions of the parties involved. If people are being unreasonable or unrealistic it's best to let emotions simmer down. It's like asking someone " Is the water blue? - Just a conversation to have with different opinions. 

• Ask yourself, if left alone will this incident resolve itself?

• When the situation is your's own take time to weigh the pros and the cons. Think about the losses and the benefits. write a list and go over it with someone you trust. pray over it, if that's what you do.

• After finding out all the facts you can then see how to move forward.

• Sometimes it may be necessary to get other people or agencies to help. Ask the experts!

• Remember anyone that asks you to violate your V.E.S.P.M. health or your boundaries is not on your side. It is up to you to stand up for yourself.

• Always be aware of the consequences for yourself and others. Advise is good until it isn’t.

• When all else fails, don't overthink it,  Mind Your Own Business as much as possible!

" But let none of you suffer as a murderer, or as a thief, or as an evildoer, or as a busybody in other man's matters." 

1 Peter 4:15 Holy Bible

Q – How did you maintain control of your V.E.S.P.M. Circle today? Give an example.

You have successfully completed this session. Click here to go to your next session.

If you need additional support or would like to request Life Coaching sessions 

please email all questions and comments to:

 8cyclesofwellnesstr@gmail.com